When Will You Start to BELIEVE in Yourself?

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It’s a New Year fresh with so many exciting opportunities and I am so happy for what I have in store for 2018.  It didn’t always used to be like this and I am sharing my story because my mission is to help others who lack confidence create a life they love.  We all have things that happen to us which are far from ideal and this can have a huge impact on how we view life and even live our lives.  So if you’re reading this and you feel you’re not living to your true potential then keep reading because you can have the life of your dreams you just have to believe it’s possible and go out there and make it happen.   

I didn’t have an amazing childhood my mother was a narcissist and made it very clear she didn’t want me.  Thank god I had a grandmother who taught me life skills that my mother wasn’t able to do.  My gran was a very strong understanding woman and everyone who met her loved her. I remember her saying to me when I was about fifteen years of age that I would be ok because I was a fighter she saw that in my nature and she drew it out of me.  When I lost my gran I was devastated she wasn’t just a gran she was my best friend not just because she spoilt me like grandmothers do but she would have some serious heart to heart chats with me and make me face up to some truths that sometimes we would rather hide from.  My gran died before the internet and social media came into our lives yet she achieved so much in her life  She was always helping others and she was a strong determined woman and she wanted all women to shine. We are so lucky to be living in the times that we do there is no excuse to hold yourself back in life yet so many do.  It’s our responsibility to use the internet and social media for the good we can use our voice and get our message out there.  It angers me so much when I see women bash on other women.  Strong women DON’T do that when you are strong and comfortable in your own skin you just shine and encourage other women around you to do the same.  

Are you working a job you hate?  Maybe you have started a business but you just don’t feel confident to shine.  If any of this is going on for you I want you to realise that you aren’t alone.  I have had to work very hard at my mindset and that isn’t easy to do when everything around you just makes you feel small.  Maybe you work for a boss who doesn’t appreciate you.  It could be that you work a job that even though it pays the bills just doesn’t fulfil you.  So many people around the world are getting made redundant every day and there aren’t many jobs to apply for.  To even get an interview these days is hard work in itself.  You may be feeling disheartened that you are applying for jobs but you never get to the interview stage.  For you ladies who are running a business you may be doing what you love but you worry that being true to you and shining brightly for the world to see is just too scary to comprehend.  Ever feel like you are holding yourself back?  I did for the longest time because of the toxic jobs I was working.  If you keep on hiding then how can you possibly think that you can have a successful business?  It will take being brave and going for it but as we know this can be easier said than done.

I have my own business making natural skincare and although I felt confident making my products I didn’t have the confidence to sell it at markets.  This was really getting me down because I knew that if I could get over my low self esteem things would change.  So what got me to make the change?  I woke up one day and decided enough was enough I wasn’t going to let toxic corporate jobs hold me back any longer.  There comes a point where you just have to go for it.  Now I understand if you are feeling scared I have been there I have worked jobs where I was just doing dead end jobs to survive.  This literally chipped away at me and I started to doubt myself.  Doubt is the killer of dreams along with fear.  It saddens me that many women in offices can be bitchy and totally strip you of your confidence if you let it.  What’s crazy is when women come together for the good magic happens.  We are such powerful amazing creatures and any woman who wants to bitch another woman has suffered pain and not dealt with it.  It can completely affect your health and confidence so I want to urge you now that if you feel you are hiding just be kind to yourself.  We are all doing the best we can but by hiding you let these people win.  You get to say how you live your life and how good it gets.  When I worked these toxic jobs I stopped being bubbly and happy because it didn’t feel safe and I started to lose myself.  I say this not that you feel sorry for me but to give any of you hope if you are experiencing something similar in your life.  We get one shot at life so don’t you think you owe it to yourself to be happy.  Stop letting other people’s opinions hold you back nobody has the right to tell you how to live your life.  Anyone who is doing this to you is wanting to keep you small and when you stay small you don’t live – period.  

There is a happy ending to this story one day when I was feeling so low in these dead end jobs hating on myself I saw a workshop which taught you how to make soap and bath bombs.  I decided to go on it for something fun to do.  I loved it but never thought for a minute that I could make a business out of it why would you when you no longer feel confident.  I want to encourage you now to do what your heart is begging you to do.  We all have that yearning to do something in our lives yet we often hold back and worry that things won’t work out we think it’s safer to sit tight and just do what everyone else is doing.  That’s ok if you’re a sheep but you are a powerful woman who is wanting so much more so you have to stop caring what others think and be brave.  It won’t be easy and you will have problems along the way but this is why we need to surround ourselves with strong powerful people who only want the best for us.  The reality that you need to really wake up to is this – you live the life you feel you are worthy of having.  Your beliefs keep you in a life that you feel comfortable with.  For you to have the life you want then you have to believe that you can have what you want.  So you will have to change your mindset and the way you do things to get a better life but isn’t it worth it to be doing what you want in life?  So right this very moment take a look at how you live your life and see what you are tolerating and then ask yourself why you believe this to be true.  It can feel harsh to do this we can start to beat ourselves up but it’s the first step to making positive change.  You realise that you are worth more than what you have been settling for.  

For you to have the life you want you will have to make sacrifices and you will have to stick your neck out but that isn’t always easy.  Now the words “self care” are buzz words and you hear them everywhere that it can be easy to switch off.  Even though I make skincare self care is more than just lying in the bath.  It’s about looking after yourself emotionally and physically but as women we struggle to do this because we find it hard to say no to others because we think we will be perceived as a bitch.  Self care involves creating boundaries and putting your needs first.  This isn’t selfish because if you don’t feel good about life you sure as hell won’t do great things in your life. I see women daily who don’t believe in themselves and dumb down their gifts.  If you work a dead beat job with a boss who isn’t bothered about you then you will lose your confidence. If you don’t love your life now do you think you will love it in five or ten years time?  If you carry on as you are then you won’t so you have to make change and even though you know this is what you need to do it may scare you or you may think it’s too difficult.  Anything in life that will bring you joy is always worth doing you just need to know where to start.  Living a life you hate can cause depression and low self esteem and you are worth so much more than just playing it safe.  Working a corporate job no longer equals success you can be made redundant any time then what? We have to believe in our own abilities and go for it but this isn’t taught in education.  As I have been through this I want to teach people that they can do and be anything they want they just have to know where to start and believe in themselves.  I want to leave you with this thought how do you want to feel when you get to the end of your life do you want to feel that you lived a life you loved on your terms or you played it safe and have actually missed out on having a wonderful life? I owe so much to my grandmother and I want to help women and the next generation reach their true potential.  We have choices nothing is ever lost so stop with the worry and instead focus on what you want out of life because anything is possible you just have to BELIEVE it’s possible for YOU.